Your body is the map
by badaax
Summary: Your body is the map, the map I follow with reverent hands and bloodshot eyes. Your skin is the fuel, my reason for breathing and living, my reason for fighting. You give me strength when I have none of my own. You and only you…Rated M


**Disclaimer: Bleach and all related characters belong to its respective owner.**

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><p>It was raining outside when he woke. That didn't surprise him; it always rained when <em>she <em>was gone. It had been over two weeks since he had returned from Soul Society with Ginjo's body, it had been over fourteen days since his powers had been thrust back into his body with all the grace and care he expected of _her. _

_Rukia_…

He wondered when she'd return. Not that she'd ever really left. He knew she'd been here, the silent sentinel on his life when seventeen months of hell had separated them. He knew she'd watched him, just like she'd said she would. Rukia never went back on her word.

Now here he was almost a man, but still very much a boy, a boy with a new uniform and a bigger sword. A boy with a quickly healing heart. He was ready for the rest of him to heal too. He just wanted, no needed her for that.

He had craved her to the point of madness. Too many times he'd brought himself to his own release, his hand gripping the places she should have been, his mind lost in memories of her hot core gripping him tight as he fell apart above her. Below her. In her. Behind her. Her, her, her.

Always her. Ever since she'd floated through his wall and then stabbed him the chest, she was the one who had filled his waking hours with visions of stupid bunnies and midget angels.

But she was no angel, she was a death-god, every bit as cold and as refined as the reaper itself. But she was his and he was hers. It was how they worked, how they came together, how they lived and fought. Their absence had hurt more than either could truly fathom.

They'd come together again, in every way imaginable, two weeks ago. She'd given him back his life and then she'd given him back herself. It was satiated bliss; even just for the few seconds he was inside her. Now he was cold, lonely and hungry once more. Always hungry, only for her.

They'd had their reunion as short and as sweet as it was. Now here he was lying in bed at 11 at night, alone, hard and miserable. His fingers fisted in the sheets swarming his body, cold sweat languidly pooling against his heated skin as memories swirled in his head.

"_Stop Ichigo," Rukia panted hotly against his ear. Her voice was traitorous betraying her want. Her hands held him tightly revealing her need. His fingers slid against her core, probing and rubbing just how she liked. She was so ready for him, so slick, so sensitive. _

"_Please, once more," He'd groaned right back, his aching flesh sliding against moist heat. She'd been ready to leave, ready to go back to her world, but he couldn't just let her go yet. _

_He couldn't remember grabbing her, but he had. He couldn't remember slipping her breasts out of her uniform, but he had. Her nipples were plump, erect and wet from were his mouth had just feasted. _

_He couldn't remember releasing himself from his jeans, as she pushed down her own hakama and made way for him. He couldn't remember lifting her up, her legs tight around his hips, their mouths locked in battle. _

_He couldn't remember a lot of things. But now all he knew was that he was inches from her and she was pulling him tighter, pulling him closer and pulling him deeper. _

"_Yes," She moaned hot against his ear as he slid slowly inside her. Building, ever slowly building, he knew the pressure she liked. _

"_I can't believe you have to go back so soon," He panted gruffly, his hips beginning their rhythm. It was slow, steady and controlled, he was teasing her, bringing her close but not close enough. "It's been too long," His words filled the straining air between them, hot breaths filling the gaps._

"_I wish you'd stay longer," He kept talking, he wasn't sure what he was saying, he just knew words were coming out. It was hard to think when he was so wrapped up in the wonder that was Rukia Kuchiki. _

"_Ichigo, just shut up and fuck me," Rukia simply snapped in response, her mouth fastened to his neck, her teeth nipping and biting. She was marking him. Possessive just like he was, she needed to leave him with something he could remember. He'd missed that about her. _

_His hands tightened on her hips and suddenly he was ramming her insides with his frantic strokes. She yelped every time he pushed forward, her head flung back, her mouth open, eyes wide in blissful shock. _

_Her hands clutched his shoulders tightly as her whole body trembled in his arms. She was small and tiny and so delicate but she could handle anything, even his punishing desperation for her. He buried his face in her neck and finally came with a choking grunt. _

_Her own release swiftly followed, her whole body tensing as her inner walls clamped around him like a molten vice. Now the silence between them was filled with their unspoken declarations. But he felt them just as acutely as she did. _

_He'd remained buried inside her, sheathed to the hilt where he belonged. His heart beat with hers, his lungs moved with hers and her arms held him together. _

"_I'll be back in two weeks, wait for me," Her parting words were pressed against his lips with fervor as she'd peeled herself away. Two weeks? That was just too fucking long. _

So here he was wallowing in some sort of twisted self-pity as thoughts of her swirled in his mind and downwards to his groin. She made his blood pump, _hard;_ it filled his veins and sparked every bone in his body, _every_ bone.

It was dark, the rain hit the window with concussive force but the house was silent. His father and sisters asleep down the hall, only he knew the tantalizing grip of insomnia. He'd napped for all of twenty minutes before his body groaned him into life once more.

Now he lay wide awake, his entire being alive and on edge. _Wait for me_, her words echoed in his mind. _Wait for me_, it had been over two weeks, so where the fuck was she? He was fighting with every instinct he had not to get up and go looking for her. He'd be patient. He had to be. But he just couldn't wait a second longer.

"It's raining up a storm out there," A deep alto voice suddenly purred gentle and assuring in the silence of the night. His head whipped sideways so fast his neck creaked.

"Awh fuck," He grumbled gruffly his hand rubbing the back of his neck as a figure wearing black glided through the wall.

_Rukia…_

Her presence brought him instantly back to life. She came through the wall the exact same way she had all those years ago on the night when his destiny began. She was a vision of delirious ecstasy.

Beautiful, delicate and noble. Her black uniform with the new short sleeve pressed to perfection. Her white gloves tight against her slim fingers. Her shorter hair curling deliciously around her jaw. Her red lips quirking upwards into a brief smile. Her eyes, dark and filled with the fire surging once more through his body.

"You know that's a bad habit you have," He smirked as she touched down on the carpet, her feet making no sound on the soft furnishings. Her eyes met his and his heart skipped a beat. Her lips curled upwards into a smirk all of their own.

"Yeah all my other boyfriends think so too," She said softly her voice filling his veins thicker than blood. His hand fell away from his neck his skin suddenly prickling uncomfortably.

"Don't say that! Dammit Rukia that's not funny!" He said sitting upright in his bed the cold ache of jealousy hard and coarse in his stomach. Rukia's smirk widened her hands shifting to the white obi tied around her middle.

"You're so much fun to tease Ichigo," She chided lightly, her fingers curling around the soft cotton on her waist. His eyes were drawn to her movements and he knew she loved it.

"Hey wait you said boyfriend," Ichigo said suddenly his eyes flicking back up to hers. Rukia's smirk changed subtly, slowly curving into a small genuine smile that was infinitely more beautiful than his mind could remember.

"So I did," She shrugged her eyes sparkling. "And you should know…boyfriend…" She began slowly her voice dropping into a seductive purr her hands tugging at the tie around her waist. "I plan on showing you just how good a girlfriend I can be."

His breath hitched in his throat the moment her obi hit the floor, her uniform spilling in a graceful heap behind her. She wasn't wearing underwear. Blood coursed through his body pooling in his lap, his erection growing swiftly, aching and already throbbing at the mere sight of her naked flesh.

She approached, casually unhurried. Her hands reached out for him, gently resting on his shoulders. The weight of her reminding him that this wasn't a dream that this was real, that she was here inches from his arms. Her eyes were wide, exposed, sucking him in with a single breath. Those eyes of hers destroyed him.

Her fingers curled around the hem of his shirt, her skin grazing his as she tugged on the material. Their eyes didn't leave each other's as she slipped it upwards. Their gaze only broke when his shirt was pulled over his head.

She dropped his discarded t-shirt on the bed beside him her hands instantly pressing against his chest. Her fingers cold, and rough from years of holding a blade but still reassuring and so steady dancing across his naked torso. His whole body trembled in anticipation, the want coursing through him along with heady desire.

Her hand stilled over his heart, her smile once more fixed firmly to her face. He wondered if she could feel how frantically his heart beat for her. He wondered if she could feel his skin prickling in expectation, feel his lungs expanding painfully, feel the sheen of sweat that was beginning to cover him.

One look at her face told him all he needed to know. She could feel all that and probably more. Fuck. The things she did to him. He was a guardian, a protector, a stalwart of strength and rigidity. But around her he was a weak man. She brought him to his knees and kept him there, bent in front of her.

"Come on, get up," She said her touch leaving his chest to grab his hand instead, her tiny digits curling around his much larger and warmer ones. She tugged him upwards, impatient and infinitely stronger than he could ever remember. He was brought to his feet so swiftly he stumbled forward towards her.

"Careful baka, I don't want squished by your giant body," She scolded lightly her arms wrapping around his waist to steady him. His own hands finally responded to her touch, his fingers trailing sparks of fire across her skin as he followed the lines of her shoulders and down the faint curves of her body. Now it was her turn to tremble.

He wasn't sure why they were standing, he wanted them to be horizontal, groaning and panting in each other's hold. But if she wanted to do it this way, then who was he to complain? As long as he could touch her, feel her close, her nipples scrapping against his muscled chest, then he was okay.

"I want to try something different tonight," She said in a hushed voice, mindful of his sleeping family. Her pale cheeks tinged faintly with pink. Her eyes lowered and rested on his chest instead of his face. He always found it cute when she was like this normally he was the one that didn't have a clue.

"We can do whatever you want Rukia," He said in the same quiet voice, his words layered with all the desperation his body was feeling. His hands stilled on her hips, his fingers kneading the soft flesh beneath him.

Her eyes flicked back up to his, a mischievous smirk quirking her lips, but the vulnerability still deep and ingrained in her gaze. She breathed deep, her chest rising sharply and pressing ever further against his own.

She pulled back her arms and immediately fastened her fingers to the waistband of the sweatpants he had worn to bed. She fixed him with her demanding stare before she slowly slid downwards, her knees coming to rest gently against the floor beneath her.

Ichigo's entire body froze at the sight. There was something so _wrong_ about seeing her knelt submissively at his feet. Her beautiful violet eyes swimming in emotion, her tiny pale fingers curled in the waistband of his pants. Her fingernails tangled with the light layer of orange hair that rested against his navel and travelled downwards.

Yes, it was true that he'd always been the more forceful when it came to them having sex. But he was a teenage boy with a teenage boy's sex drive and his chosen partner was a woman ten times his age. It wasn't surprising he wanted it so much.

But Rukia, Rukia had always been the more dominant. She was always the one pushing and pulling him in the ways that she wanted and he was only too willing to oblige. Her pleasure meant his pleasure and he'd do anything to make sure she was happy.

But seeing her here, at his feet, her eyes begging him to understand, to understand what she wanted even though she didn't even know herself. It made him feel powerful. It was a different kind of power than being a soul reaper. It made his whole body come alight. He couldn't wait to swap roles and give her the same feeling.

He was snapped back to life when her hands tugged at his pants. She slowly, painfully slowly, began to slide them downwards, his boxers coming with them. She slid the material over his hips, the elastic catching slightly on his swollen length. She tugged sharply.

Suddenly he was free, his throbbing erection springing out of its confinement inches from her face and her lips and _her._ His pants and boxers hit the floor a few moments later and he dutifully stepped out of them and kicked them away.

Now he was just as naked and as exposed as she was, except he wasn't the one kneeling mere centimeters from her sex. He couldn't stop watching her as she watched him. Her tiny tongue pressed against her teeth as she inspected his length.

He didn't know why it was so different now. She'd looked at him before this way. But there was something in her eyes that was so new, so appealing, so exciting for him.

"You're bigger," She said softly her eyes flicking up to his. The fingers of his right hand gently pressed against the back of her head, a reassuring hold. "I guess seventeen months really is a long time." He could hear the guilt and regret laced in her voice.

They had had their reunion last week, a couple of times actually, but there had been no time for an inspection or for taking it slow. It had been quick, rushed, hurried, wonderful yes and still just as explosive but its purpose had been to satisfy themselves as quickly as possible not as thoroughly as possible. That was what tonight was for.

Now here she was knelt before him, her eyes scrutinizing the very organ he had used many times to bring her high before pulling her apart. He loved that he was the only one who could do that for her, to her.

"Yeah it was a long time Rukia, but it'll never happen again, I won't let it," He said his voice sure and steady in the night. Steadier than how his insides currently felt. Her eyes flicked back up to him.

"Yes, you're right," Was all she said before she enveloped his hard length with her hot mouth.

"Oh fuck," He groaned his whole body tensing as her tongue ran the length of his shaft.

She'd done this only once before. The night after Grimmjow had punched a hole through her stomach. Ichigo had been so pissed off, so inconsolable with rage and guilt.

She'd simply come in through the window and pushed him backwards onto his bed. Then she climbed up beside him, pulled down his pants and sucked his quickly hardening length into her warm mouth.

It hadn't taken long before he was groaning that he was about to come. She'd forced her own head down further and held him fast. He'd erupted harder and wilder than he'd ever done before and she swallowed everything that he'd had to offer. He'd then returned the favor.

But this time was different, so very, very different. Her tongue lapped around the head of his length, before delving into the tiny slit that was already seeping for her. Her eyes glanced up at him and he choked on his own saliva. It was hard, so hard to stay in control when his own cock was grazing the inside of her cheek and her eyes danced with flames.

She reached for his hand, gripping it tightly in her own as she guided him back to her hair. His fingers fisted in her short, silky smooth locks and he got her unspoken message. Her hands gripped his thighs as she pulled herself closer to him and his hips bucked unceremoniously into her mouth.

He felt the tip of his length touch the back of her throat and it took all that he had not to just explode right there and then. He couldn't concentrate, he could barely breathe. All he could think about was the hot mouth on him and Rukia's hands gripping tightly onto his thighs.

His legs trembled and he knew he was getting close. But he didn't want to come here, not like this anyway.

"Stop, stop," He panted using the grip he had on her hair to gently pull her off him. She glanced up at him, confusion and something akin to hurt swirling in her eyes.

He let go of her and dropped down in front of her, his longer legs dropping around her body as he pulled her closer.

"Ichigo why didn't you-?" Her words were swiftly cut of by his mouth slamming against hers.

He could taste himself on her tongue, and instantly wished it was the other way round. He wished she could taste herself on his. His hands grappled for her, gripping her ass as he pulled her upwards into his lap.

"I want to come inside you," He panted breaking their kiss. Her eyes widened before becoming half-lidded and deeply aroused once more. Her legs curled around his hips and his throbbing erection grazed against her wet core. She was already ready for him.

He wrapped his arms around her body and lowered his mouth. He pulled one taut nipple in between his lips and her whole body arched towards him. He felt her hands press against the back of his head to hold him in place, her other hand gripping his arm tightly for support.

His teeth and lips tugged and played with her nipple his other hand moving to play with the neglected one, his thumb and fingers pinching her roughly. He finally released her, his eyes moving back to hers, which were dark and frantic for him. His hands wrapped around her tiny waist, his long fingers almost touching in the middle.

His eyes hungrily mapped her body, his eyes stinging with _something_, he'd missed her so much. He had thought he'd never see her again. But no here she was, his death god, wrapped in his arms, her body panting and straining for his.

She was the reason for who he was. She gave him the power to protect, she gave him his resolve and she gave him a reason to hope and believe in the future again. She was his strength when he had none of his own.

Those were the thoughts that swirled inside his head as he brought the tip of his erection to the mouth of her trembling core. She gulped compulsively and reached forward to him. Her hands held his face, her thumbs trailing along his sweating skin.

They'd never tried this position before. But Ichigo liked it immensely. She was so close to him, her breasts pressed against his chest, her legs wrapped around his waist and his hips, his own legs holding her up as she curled around him. It was torturously intimate, a beautiful embrace for fervent lovers.

His eyes didn't leave hers as he forced himself into her with a soft exhale of air. Her head flew back, a sultry moan leaving her luscious lips. He couldn't resist it, couldn't help himself, he bent forward sucking her pale skin into his mouth, his lips feasting hungrily on her beautiful neck.

Her hands clutched his head as he began his assault. His hips and ass moving back as much as the carpeted floor would allow before he thrust himself back into her. She moaned again, her teeth biting her lip to control the volume.

Her hips ground on top of him, her moist center so gripping and tight around his throbbing length. He knew he wouldn't last long, especially not after the effect her mouth had had on him. But judging from the way she was moaning and squirming in his arms, she was just as close as he was.

His lips trailed along her neck up to her jaw, his kisses hot and heavy against her skin. She clutched him to her, her grip strong and unyielding, just like her will. His hands pressed against the small of her back, forcing her into him as they rode each other.

"Ichigo," She panted urgently, one of her hands forcing his head up. She pressed her mouth hungrily against his and a second later a tortured whimper left her lips and surged into his. Her inner walls clamped down hard around him as her release hit them both.

His hips sped up without conscious thought and a second later she caught his groan of satisfaction in her mouth as he spilled himself inside of her. He slumped against her, her sweating skin slick and hot against his. Her forehead pressed into the crook of his neck and he could feel her lips grazing the skin at his throat as she pressed soft kisses against him.

When he could stand, several shaky and blissful minutes later. He lifted them both up, her legs still wrapped around him, his softened length still happily embedded in her. She groaned at the movement but snuggled closer to him all the same.

He carried her to his bed, gently lying her down both of them hissing as he finally slipped out of her. He sat beside her, his hip pressed against her side as he stared at her. Her chest still rose and fell sharply, her breath slowly returning.

Her whole body was flushed and her hair was messy and drenched in sweat. But she had never looked more beautiful. Never had she looked more appealing spread out, naked and sated on his bed. She was his, all his, just as he was hers.

His hand reached across to her other side, his thumb brushing over her warm skin, his eyes hungrily drinking her in. He could feel her gaze on him, but he couldn't meet her, he didn't want her to see just how much her absence had affected him. Just how glad she was to be back. He didn't want her to recognize this heat in his eyes as tears.

He wasn't crying. No off course not. But he was damn near close to it. Trust this tiny slip of a woman to be the one to simultaneously pick him up and bring him down, in the worst way.

But just like always she understood him better than he understood himself. Her hand pressed against the one he had on her waist. Her fingers trailed over the back of his own. He got the message. She was here and she wasn't going anywhere.

His eyes rested for a moment on the three scars on her stomach and chest. Three scars given to her by an espada that he had never met. They'd never talked about it. They hadn't had the chance but now she was here, it was definitely a conversation he was bringing up.

With a tired sigh he finally let himself relax. He was exhausted and satisfied in ways he had forgot existed. Her hand tugged him towards her and he gladly followed. His eyes finally meeting hers, her own emotions mirroring his.

She pulled him down until he was laying on his back, then she was there, on top of him, her leg pulling both of his to her, her head resting on his chest, her ear right above his still wildly beating heart.

Silence prevailed between them. But that's how it always was with them, they didn't have to speak to fill the gaps, their presence alone did that. His arms wrapped around her, one of his hands sliding into her hair, the other dancing fingers along the side of her breast and waist as her skin prickled under his touch.

He loved her lying there, on his chest right above his heart, holding him close. He loved his fingers in her damp hair, her warm breaths on his skin. He loved…yeah…

"Did you miss me?" She asked after a few moments of continued silence. Her question wasn't laced with vanity it was laced with genuine curiosity. It reminded him that sometimes Rukia didn't have all the answers. But he was okay with that; he could help her get them.

"Yes Rukia, I did, everyday, and most mornings too," He added with a smirk she couldn't see. He thrusted his hips upwards his still flaccid length pressing against her, he knew she got his meaning.

"Pervert," She hissed, lightly elbowing him in the ribs before she settled against him once more. "I thought of you too," She said after another moment of silence.

Ichigo's smirk widened and his hands held her closer, possessive as always.

"It's okay to admit you missed me, I understand," He mumbled against her forehead, his lips pressing against her skin.

"Who said anything about missing you?" She bristled turning her head to rest her chin on his chest so she could meet his gaze, her lips morphed into that dangerous smirk of hers. "I just thought of you is all…but I might have missed you…I'm not sure yet."

Ichigo laughed, he couldn't help it, it was low and deep and coursed through his body and into hers.

"Che. Don't worry about it Rukia, I think you and I both know the truth," He smiled down at her. She pressed her lips against his chest before snuggling back into his warm embrace.

"So how's this going to work now? I'm a lieutenant, I can't just leave and come back to the world of the living and you have school, you're a senior now," She said in a small voice and he could practically hear the cogs in her brain turning. Trust Rukia to begin over analyzing something so simple.

"Hey, you stop that," He said squeezing her shoulder to get her attention. "We're going to do this the same way we've been doing this since the start. Together. So what if you're not here and I can't go there. I'll promise to wait for you, always, if you promise to do the same."

His confession was honest but still tinged with nervousness and the naivety of his youth. What if she rejected him? What if he didn't mean to her what she meant to him?

"Idiot," She said lightly, her breaths warm against his chest. "I'll always wait for you, _always_." He knew his arms must be painful around her but he didn't care, besides she was gripping him just as tightly.

They weren't good with emotions, but actions spoke louder than words, just like that time she kicked him in the face for being so pathetic. The truth was simple, just like it had always been.

They might not say it out loud, but they both knew in their hearts just how important this bond, this connection was. Ichigo didn't want to lose it and judging from the way she was holding him so tightly to her, he guessed she didn't want to either.

"Alright then shinigami," He said softly. Her laugh was shaky and breathless against his chest. She moved her head again, her eyes pouring into his along with her soul.

"It's not shinigami, it's Kuchiki, Kuchiki Rukia," Her words were the same as always, just like that sweet small smile of hers.

His lips meet hers with careful grace and for that moment they were content. Trouble may come and discord may set in. But they would wait. Always. His hands gripped her body and held her close. For she was the map, the map to home.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed this story. <strong>


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